February 25, 2006

teci's thesis, episode 10: nothing a "waste" :)

nothing to waste :)

all the ideas, input, effort were actually worth it :)

nope, i'm not yet finished with my thesis --- far from it! but i suddenly got a flash of insight that made me realize how all i'm doing makes sense. (hehe, it all finally made sense! :D )

after the joy in realizing how it all fits...

...came the serenity, the fulfillment, the PEACE with knowing it was all worth it.

NOW i know why things had to be that way...why i had to do what i did.

it wasn't really a matter of life and death to me...i would be "okay" even if some things i did won't actually bear fruit, or bear the wrong fruit (ex: a good intention leading to a hurtful situation). [disclaimer: "The wages of sin is death (Romans 6:23)." at times we think our sin is "okay" just because we don't see the actual hurt we inflict on God and on other people, and/or because the consequences aren't that immediate.]

...but it means so much nonetheless. to know that (as cheesy/cliche-ish/corny as this sounds) everything has a purpose makes life worth living, doesn't it?

if life started as a mere random collision among molecules, then it wouldn't really matter if i do good, or do bad, or just bum around forever writing my randomly-selected words that wouldn't really matter to my fellow randomly-popped-out-of-nowhere human beings.


but if everything matters

then and all life is precious...

and nothing goes to waste.

it's a reassurance, a comfort.

right now, in doing my thesis, it's that small little twig, branching out of the high cliff, that i'm desperately hanging on to :)

God bless, everybody :)

Exodus 9:16
But I have raised you up for this very purpose, that I might show you my power and that my name might be proclaimed in all the earth.

Psalm 33:11
But the plans of the LORD stand firm forever, the purposes of his heart through all generations.

Psalm 57:2
I cry out to God Most High, to God, who fulfills {his purpose} for me.

Psalm 138:8
The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me; your love, O LORD, endures forever — do not abandon the works of your hands.

Proverbs 19:21
Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails.

Isaiah 14:24
The LORD Almighty has sworn, "Surely, as I have planned, so it will be, and as I have purposed, so it will stand.

Isaiah 49:4
But I said, "I have labored to no purpose; I have spent my strength in vain and for nothing. Yet what is due me is in the LORD's hand, and my reward is with my God."

Romans 8:28
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

Jeremiah 32:19
Great are your purposes and mighty are your deeds.

Philippians 2:13
For it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose.

2 Timothy 1:9
[God,] who has saved us and called us to a holy life—not because of anything we have done but because of his own purpose and grace.

teci's thesis, episode 9: thank You God! :)

yay! :)

thank You God! :) :)

and thanks to everyone who's prayed for me (and will continue to pray for me and support me, it's not yet over! :) ).

as i was (finally) starting to write my thesis outline, i got to see how it all fits together.

(okay, so i should have written that outline long ago, and my entire thesis for that matter :D but i'm doing other things that are as important and maybe even more so: like rewriting my program and getting data. :) even if i did write my outline earlier, i would still need to have that clarity of insight, that realization, that i just got minutes earlier.)

before tonight (er, this very early morning) i and everyone else thought i was working on two distinctly different research problems, even if they're on the same topic (social networks, information propagation ==> translation: gossip. yup yup, this is serious scientific research in getting my Master's degree in Physics! i'm not kidding and i'm not being sarcastic. i actually love doing this doesn't-really-look-like-physics (parang-physics-na-hindi) research :)

and then suddenly, it all fits.


nothing would be gone to waste. no time nor thoughts, no data nor program codes, would be wasted. all would be used to produce a worthy thesis (even if i do say so myself!).

yay :)

teci's thesis, episode 8: please pray for me!

four days and counting....

LORD help me.....

February 21, 2006

as a spokesperson: it's not about me

Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander. 1 Peter 3:15-16

because of several instances my conscience is not clear...i declare God's goodness in my life and as seen around us...but there were times i took the mocking and the hate and the bigotry personally. (sorry, Lord...)

even if what they're saying is totally against God, or completely false...

i shouldn't take it personally against me.
i'm talking about God's plans and purposes, not my own. although i may be directly attacked, it's only because i'm now talking about God. it's not about me anymore!
wait, i just realized this --- i'm being attacked because i'm not focused on my self anymore...so why should my pride and my ego be damaged when i'm not focused on my self anymore?
(sorry if it sounds redundant, but it's the only way i could make this point :) )

(ii) i have to understand where they're coming from.

i wasn't born into this world with a perfectly clear understanding of who God is and what His purposes were in creating me. for the longest time, i didn't know, or worse, i didn't care. how BLIND of me to expect from others what i cannot expect from myself.
(iii) all the more i should empathize with them and show them the way!
they need God all the more! it would be so tempting for me to stop and take the easy way out, but how would that help anyone?
Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed. If you are insulted because of the name of Christ, you are blessed, for the Spirit of glory and of God rests on you. If you suffer, it should not be as a murderer or thief or any other kind of criminal, or even as a meddler. However, if you suffer as a Christian, do not be ashamed, but praise God that you bear that name. For it is time for judgment to begin with the family of God; and if it begins with us, what will the outcome be for those who do not obey the gospel of God? And,
"If it is hard for the righteous to be saved,
what will become of the ungodly and the sinner? [Proverbs 11:31]"
So then, those who suffer according to God's will should commit themselves to their faithful Creator and continue to do good. 1 Peter 4:12-19

LORD, help me to always talk about you with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience. i'm doing all this for Your glory, not for mine. i'm doing all this for the sake of my fellow men, not for me.

i'm Your work in progress and Your imperfect spokesperson, but knowing that it's not about me makes a big difference in what i do :)

Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms. If anyone speaks, he should do it as one speaking the very words of God...so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen. 1 Peter 4:10-11

be holy :)

Therefore, prepare your minds for action; be self-controlled; set your hope fully on the grace to be given you when Jesus Christ is revealed. As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance. But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do; for it is written: "Be holy, because I am holy. [Lev. 11:44,45; 19:2; 20:7]"

Since you call on a Father who judges each man's work impartially, live your lives as strangers here in reverent fear. For you know that it was not with perishable things such as silver or gold that you were redeemed from the empty way of life handed down to you from your forefathers, but with the precious blood of Christ, a lamb without blemish or defect.

For you have been born again, not of perishable seed, but of imperishable, through the living and enduring word of God. For,
"All men are like grass,
and all their glory is like the flowers of the field;

the grass withers and the flowers fall,
but the word of the Lord stands forever.
[Isaiah 40:6-8]"

And this is the word that was preached to you.

Dear friends, I urge you, as aliens and strangers in the world, to abstain from sinful desires, which war against your soul. Live such good lives among the pagans that, though they accuse you of doing wrong, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day he visits us.

Therefore, since Christ suffered in his body, arm yourselves also with the same attitude, because he who has suffered in his body is done with sin. As a result, he does not live the rest of his earthly life for evil human desires, but rather for the will of God. For you have spent enough time in the past doing what pagans choose to do—living in debauchery, lust, drunkenness, orgies, carousing and detestable idolatry. They think it strange that you do not plunge with them into the same flood of dissipation, and they heap abuse on you. But they will have to give account to him who is ready to judge the living and the dead. For this is the reason the gospel was preached even to those who are now dead, so that they might be judged according to men in regard to the body, but live according to God in regard to the spirit.

1 Peter 1:13-19, 23-25, 2:11-12, 3:1-6

February 19, 2006

teci's thesis, episode 7: short happy updates =)

update 1: deadline of thesis draft has been moved =)
update 2: program is finally bug-free and running =)

yay! =) =)

not an angel yet -- on PURITY

At the resurrection people will neither marry nor be given in marriage; they will be like the angels in heaven.
Matthew 22:30

last time i checked, i was still a human being.

and FAR from being a heavenly creature.

what a comfort His Word is =) check these out (i googled "Bible purity" and was totally encouraged by God's Word as applied to my situation :) in the following sites) :
as a friend once exhorted me, that's EXACTLY why we need God -- we can't do it (be pure and stay pure) from our own efforts.

God is good. =)

Away from me, satan. i'm practicing purity through His strength, not mine. victory is assured.

i'm not an angel, and far from perfect. But I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. (Philippians 4:13)

yay =)


the more you think you don't need God...
the more you actually need Him.

So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don't fall!
1 Corinthians 10:12

February 15, 2006

teci's thesis, episode 6: why i had my hair cut :p

recorded below are the events that transpired on valentine's afternoon till the early morning of the next day. ending inconclusively, wandering aimlessly, drifting into sleep -- i eventually took it all out on my hair. (though my hair's now too short, so i wonder what i'll do as a frustration-releaser next time...)

2:46 PM. segmentation fault.
i don't even know what that is...
but i do know it means "program error!!!"
try for smaller scale, simpler cases...

2:59 PM. error-prone parameters?
changing ** would induce segmentation fault for some other ***.
why o why...

3:09 PM. varying even a little bit...
varying ***
varying ***
plus spaces in output...now know where to look... :)

3:30 PM. output ok (hehehe...)
but the output still says error... :p
plus i found a magic value *** where nothing goes wrong! strange!

4:24 PM. hi! still here!
getting closer (hopefully!)...

5:14 PM. still error!...
still need to do something else...

11:35 PM. i'm back!
a little valentine's dinner and coffee with a friend :)
now what?

11:47 PM. is error in *** or ***?
yup: in ****
yup: in ****

11:56 PM. hmmm!
it seems error is neither in *** or *** but in something else entirely...
hope increases (even by a bit! :) )

12:31 AM. oops!
neither in ***/*** nor in latter suspect *** but in ***

12:34 AM. correction...
it's in both **** and **** pala
whoa, one at a time please... :)

1:15 AM. isolated the problem
well, sort of...
in one of two issues...
i *think* but i'm not sure...

2:17 AM. hello friend! :)
made small talk and woke myself up by surfing (ooops...)
total coolness http://www.comic-con.org/wc/assets/xmen_lg.jpg!!!!
back to work! :)

2:57 AM. still nothing?
no *conclusive* results. still with error. lots of debugging *effort* with no *results*...

teci's thesis, episode 5: hair yesterday, gone today!

i have lost most of my hair!!!

i went to a beauty salon of all places! :) this is the first time, disregarding "required" occasions such as prom and graduation ball, that i, out of my own volition, without any coercion at all, went and paid someone to make me beautiful.


my frustration is showing. :D

i was awake until the wee hours last night. my program still contained errors. and so i began to think of the other things i *had* to do, which if i put in effort i would actually see *results*.

case in point, my hair. all my childhood i had short hair, so i really don't mind letting it grow long every now and then. but now i saw that it had to go. (not all of it!)

(1) my mother regularly reminds me to have it cut already.

(2) i hate the fact that it looks good in the morning only when i'm alone! but in class, it's disorderly and the layers just look like a mess. and when i tie it with my trusty ponytails the purpose of having long hair is defeated (at least, most of the time).

(3) but to be honest i'm just taking out all my frustration about my thesis (or lack thereof) and directing it towards my hair. hair, you gotta go.

my sorry state of reasoning goes like this: at least if i go to a parlor to have it cut, it *will* get cut. whereas if i stay and debug and debug, there's no assurance i will have a perfectly-working program.

(4) and to be honest, i really need a change.
not that i haven't been going around to places every night. (oops.)

(5) this all shows that i am a coward.
i don't want to face reality; i don't want to look my problems in the eye and PERSEVERE as i look for ways to solve them.

"don't tell God how big your mountains are...
tell your mountains how big your God is!"


God, sorry for being such a coward in denial.

besides, in the words of that great man of faith David:

The LORD is my light and my salvation—
whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the stronghold of my life—
of whom shall I be afraid?
(Psalm 27:1)

that's right.

still, having realized all these, i'm glad and i feel blessed because of my haircut. i look good! (even if i do say so myself!)

ok, back to work now :)

February 13, 2006

teci's thesis, episode 4: a day in thesis making

i have to convince myself that this is defendable

that this is interesting

that this ROCKS!!! :)

okie :)

(LORD help me....!!!!)

ok na naman (hmm) yung vector, gawa na lang ako ng output procedures...

ok na naman (hmm) yung non-vector, gawan ko lang ng taoPtr and other stuff...

so probably stick with vectors? kasi practically yun rin lang naman ang gagawin sa non-vector.

12:52 PM time check.



1:18 PM. thank You LORD!!!
(floating point exception removed) :)
remove all "static" declarations because my variables are not static! they're variable! :p
--> meaning if i have to use them many times, they shouldn't be declared static and they shouldn't retain their original values and defeat the purpose of the program..

1:25PM. yipes!
floating point exception pops its head up once again...

2:45 PM. weird. sometimes with floating point exception, sometimes ok...

4:36 PM. A...OK.
thank You LORD!!!!!
(in the meantime i took a nap, played a little, surfed a little, and drifted off a lot -- physically and mentally.)
thanks God for showing me what's wrong and what needs to be fixed!!!
(specifically, it's about randomizing: to choose randomly among items, there has to be MORE THAN ONE item! duh! :p but it's a special case that the people behind the code haven't really considered...so programmers like me who use their language have to scratch their individual heads before coming to the same answer. waste of time, i say. still, a testimony that even computer whizzes are human. hope they turned to God and finally found Him along the way :D like i've been doing right now!!!)

4:48 PM.
finalized debugging (at least for THIS problem), will now proceed to remove all indicator comments (these are the 'signs' along the way to check if the program is doing what it's supposed to do...).

5:02 PM. now what?
do for large-scale data!!!! yeah! :)
um, wait, get a valid output procedure first! :)

5:10 PM. meat of the matter.
get good ways of how to output data:
* stability time (no more ****)
--> as fraction of ****
* *** at stable time
--> as fraction of ****
* *** at stable time

2:47 AM. still awake!!!
hehe, don't think i've been programming all this time :D went home to have dinner with my family (happy birthday bro Dex and cuzin Ayeen!), was away for four hours or so.
now optimizing my program...

WOW! Thanks God!!! listen to me, OPTIMIZING my program?!?! meaning, it's already working and all i'm doing is to make it better? :) yahoo!!! :)

though i have to sleep too...and check my students' papers (oops...)

3:17 AM. woohoo!
woohoo! am on a roll...well, of course not, debugging doesn't come easy...but it really feels good when there are no errors reported by the computer. :)
(for those of you out there who are seriously concerned and want to tell me to get a life, i am! that's why it took so long to do my thesis in the first place! :) )

3:55 AM. yahoo!! hey hey hey!!!
i honestly need to get some sleep....
and i do feel sleepy....
but i love debugging!!! :)
(especially when the errors are non-existent!)

my program now optimized and ready to run. will have it run for varying parameters, while i finally get some sleep :) hope there's still time to prepare for my class!!! :)

whee :)

thank You Lord :) :)

February 10, 2006

teci's thesis, episode 3: all it takes

all it takes is A LITTLE faith. even the smallest of the small.
as long as it's sincere.
faith = complete, total trust.
it doesn't have to be big faith, because it's the One you're trusting who's BIG.
The apostles said to the Lord, "Increase our faith!"
He replied, "If you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mulberry tree, 'Be uprooted and planted in the sea,' and it will obey you.
(Luke 17:5-6)
Then the disciples came to Jesus in private and asked, "Why couldn't we drive [the demon] out?" He replied, "Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you." (Matthew 17:19-20)
i believe in God and know that He'll see me through. the details, though, i don't know yet.
but just today God gave me a hint...
believe in...
(drumroll, please...)
hehehe. hmm, this might sound like false teaching! :)
but of course not! :) i only mean that in the course of trusting God in the abstract, i fail to see myself actually doing my thesis and finishing it on time, this semester. it has sometimes become a cliche for me to say that God will see me through, while i don't concretely, clearly believe that it will happen to me.
how simplistic, you might think. ah, yes! it's sometimes the simple things that i do not see.
besides, how can i see that i sincerely believe that God will help me, if i do not see myself succeeding? if i see myself triumph, the glory and the thanks still belong to Him for helping me. and if i don't see myself victorious, then i don't really have even a mustard seed of faith.
i'm so blessed that my research advisers have for a long time believed in me fully, more than i do in myself. i'm honored for that. :)
but something one adviser said struck me a while ago.
i have to believe that my thesis statement is true. that the claim in my research is valid. then it will all start to happen.
that's how it happened to my adviser. (talk about giving great advice!) sincerely, be convinced within yourself that it's possible, no matter what others say. it's all up to you, it all depends on you believing sincerely that it's possible and you can see it happen :)
interesting! faith before action. you have to believe it before you see it! :)
(i was right in making this a series! so much testimony for one thesis that doesn't even exist yet!!! oops! don't show this blog to my advisers!!!...)
The kingdom of God is like a mustard seed, which is the smallest seed you plant in the ground. Yet when it grows, it is the largest of garden plants and becomes a tree, so that the birds of the air come and perch in its branches. (Mark 4:30-31; Matthew 13:31-32; Luke 13:18-19)

teci's thesis, episode 2: ask and you shall receive (techie teci version)

ask and you shall receive. :)
  • For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.
  • If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer.
  • Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.
  • For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.
  • Until now you have not asked for anything in My name. Ask and you will receive, and your joy will be complete.
  • What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don't they come from your desires that battle within you? You want something but don't get it. You kill and covet, but you cannot have what you want. You quarrel and fight. You do not have, because you do not ask God.
  • Dear friends, if our hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence before God and receive from him anything we ask, because we obey his commands and do what pleases him.
(Scripture verses in order of appearance: Matthew 7:8; Matthew 21:22; Mark 11:24; Luke 11:10; John 16:24; James 4:1-2; 1 John 3:21-22.)

Jesus repeated it over and over. Eventually His disciples got the point and repeated it in their writings as well. ask and you shall receive. you do not have because you do not ask.

LORD! i thought. i can't expect Him to drop my hardbound typed thesis manuscript on my lap, eh? (hmm, why not..?)

all night, for several weeks my research output was nada. ah, yes, i was never the most productive in our dear lab, but the exasperation over the IMPRESSION that i'm not doing anything and that i'm worthless really bothered me. my dear coworkers knew i was working hard, but to no avail. me, i just wanted results NOW. then i get reminded of the manhours lost in this fruitless exercise...time that should have been spent eating (oops! my priorities are showing), and checking my students' papers!! plus the thesis draft deadline is within the month!!!!

why Lord why? i kept on browsing the net for info on how to make my program run. WHY isn't it running?!?! i've done all that's needed...i checked all the possible combinations...i read and reread the programming advice...


was waiting for the brilliant flash of inspiration, that TING! like a light bulb suddenly turning on...


i kept on it, and kept on it, and kept on whining to God like the brat that i am, and made sure i don't fall asleep. NEVER GIVE UP!

then i got sleepy. still no results as of slumbertime.

next day. wake up and leave dorm to take a bath and change before anyone (translation: my students) see me and realize that i was wearing the same outfit i had yesterday. (nope, am not ruled by any fashion police, it's just that the implications are i'm now smelly. which might be true!!!)

sigh, another yet unsuccessful overnight, working on (seemingly) nothing. and that day (thursday) is the day of our weekly research meeting with my adviser. how many weeks do i have to say that i have no results for that week? oh boy. in general i consider myself a non-conforming, independent (hahaha) individual who goes ahead no matter what the world thinks --- but not today.

so come research meeting i had to swallow my pride and say nothing. or rather, i said something: the word "nothing". haaay.

since our dear programming genius was present, i showed him the problem, my stationary program. (get it? it's not running, so it's...ah, never mind.) (in a more literal sense, i'm going around in circles, so...)

know what he did? he typed TWO WORDS.


to be exact, -lgsl -lcblas.

guess what happened? of course my program ran.

ask and you shall receive.

the lesson here, of course, is to ask God and be open to how He's going to answer. admittedly there are MANY times when it's easier to ask God than ask our family, friends, or strangers. (Example: if i'm lost in a big city, should i pretend to know where i'm going while frantically praying silently that i'll end up where i'm supposed to be?)

it's pride, follower-of-God version. while prebelievers would rather ask people for help than turn to God, a possible issue with a believer like me is that i won't or can't trust people anymore. (hey i'm not saying i don't trust our computer genius! :) just read on...)

it's also pride because i'd rather do things on my own than ask for help. oh sure i ask help from God. but how is He going to help me with my program? will the keyboard type the right code by itself? will my earphones suddenly pick up God's human voice telling me to type "-lgsl -lcblas"?

those are possible, but it's also possible that God is helping me by using other people to talk to me. why not? He surely didn't give me all the talent in the world, right?

But God has combined the members of the body...so that there should be no division in the body, but that its parts should have equal concern for each other. Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it. (1 Corinthians 12:24,25,27)

(by the way please read all of 1 Corinthians 12! all about gifts and talents. how inspiring that in our weaknesses we need each other and make the whole strong. :) )

even if i ask help from God, i still show my pride because i can't or don't want to ask help from others. i still want the image of self-sufficiency, even if it's far from the truth.

why can't i ask?

if i don't ask, how else will it be given to me?


February 2, 2006

the tale of three trees

(ALL that follows is from Joel Osteen's best-selling 'Your Best Life Now'. very powerful! :) i can back up the following story with my life, too!)

I recently read a retelling of the timeless story "The Tale of Three Trees". This fictitious children's book relates the lofty aspirations of an olive tree, an oak tree, and a pine tree. Each of these trees had a great dream to become something special in life. The olive tree dreamed of becoming a finely crafted treasure chest. It wanted to hold gold, silver, and precious jewels. One day a woodsman chose the one olive tree, out of all the trees in the forest, and cut it down. The olive tree was so thrilled. But as the craftsmen began working on him, the tree realized they weren't making him into a beautiful treasure chest; they were making him into a manger to hold food for dirty, smelly animals. Heartbroken, his dreams were shattered. He felt worthless and demeaned.

Similarly, the oak tree dreamed of becoming part of a huge ship that would carry important kings across the ocean. When the woodsman cut down the oak, he was so excited. But as time went on, he realized the craftsmen weren't making him into a huge ship. They were making him into a tiny fishing boat. He was so discouraged, so disappointed.

The pine tree lived on top of a high mountain. Its only dream was to always stand tall and remind people of God's creation. But in a split second, a bolt of lightning sent it tumbling to the ground, destroying its dreams. The woodsman came and picked it up and carried it off to the scrap pile.

All three of these trees felt they had lost their value and their worth; they were so discouraged, so disappointed. Not one of their dreams had come to pass. But God had other plans for these trees. Many years later, Mary and Joseph couldn't find any place to give birth to their little baby boy. They finally found a stable, and when Jesus was born they placed him in a manger made from --- you guessed it --- the olive tree. The olive tree had wanted to hold precious jewels, but God had better plans, and it now held the greatest treasure of all time, the Son of God.

A few years went by and Jesus grew up. One day He needed a boat to cross to the other side of the lake. He didn't choose a large, fancy ship; He chose a small, simple fishing boat made from --- you guessed it --- the oak tree. The oak tree wanted to carry important kings across the ocean, but God had better plans. The oak now carried the King of kings.

A few more years went by, and one day some Roman soldiers were rummaging around in the pile of scrap wood where the discarded pine tree lay. That pine tree just knew they were coming to cut him up for firewood. But much to its surprise, they cut only two small pieces out of it and formed them into a cross. And it was on this pine tree that Jesus was crucified. That tree is still pointing people to God's love and God's compassion to this day.

The point of the classic story is clear: All three trees thought they had lost their value, that their stories were over, yet they became integral parts of the greatest story ever told.

God knows your value; He sees your potential. You may not understand everything you are going through right now. But hold your head up high, knowing that God is in control and He has a great plan and purpose for your life. Your dreams may not have turned out exactly as you'd hoped, but the Bible says that God's ways are better and higher than our ways. Even when everybody else rejects you, remember, God stands before you with His arms open wide. He always accepts you! He always confirms your value. You are His prized possession. No matter what you go through in life, no matter how many disappointments you suffer, your value in God's eyes always remains the same. You will always be the apple of His eye. He will never give up on you, so don't give up yourself.