December 17, 2011

Talk it out!

"Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift." [1]

"If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother." [2]

For the longest time, my favorite (fictional) person was this mutant mind reader. But I'm neither a mutant nor a mind reader, so I need *communication*. When there is a conflict, problem or issue, there has to be a resolution.

A leader of mine says we tend to judge other people by their actions, but we judge ourselves by our intentions. When it comes to *others*, I tend to just be judgmental and assume the worst. This should not be.

The Bible talks about satan, the eternal enemy of God and all His works (including us, His children), who accuses us before God and each other. How many times have I agreed with satan when I serve as judge, jury and executioner towards others?

Remember (preaching to myself):
1. I might be wrong. I do not know all the details.
2. I am just the same, or worse. C.S. Lewis says, "My heart — I need no other’s — showeth me the wickedness of the ungodly." (Thanks for the quote Rayda.) Acknowledging my faults makes it easier to forgive others'.
3. I am not The Judge. I do not have the authority nor the power. I am just a fellow sister.

And that is why communication is important. When there is an issue between two parties:
1. Perhaps it was only a misunderstanding.
2. Perhaps one party did hurt/grieve/injure the other, but unintentionally.
3. Perhaps one or both did injure the other, but why?

All these can be resolved if each party airs his/her/their side... and listens to the other side.

We are different people, but let's take these differences constructively. We can learn from each other and grow. Let's appreciate each other, understand, and celebrate. :)

I'm not a mind-reader, but I am a person with one mouth and two ears. May I use them well.

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