please pray for me as i pursue my true calling...
...while i make the most of where i am.
in plain English: please pray for me as i
resolve to resign from my job as a college physics teacher to pursue my true calling as
a Christian writer while i make the most of
being a PhD student.
:)
(to those who are currently my students: yes, with God's grace i'll also make the most of being your teacher :) don't worry :) don't hesitate to tell me how to serve you better :) )
if i'm not a teacher anymore...
- i won't have the opportunity to be a walking testimony of God's love to my students as well as my co-teachers
- i won't have the opportunity to share God's Word on the blackboard every day
- i won't have the opportunity to show everyone that YES, IT CAN BE DONE! you can love and follow God even while teaching science in the most secular school in the country
but if i'm not a teacher anymore...
- i will have the opportunity to testify of God's love to a larger audience outside one classroom or laboratory (today Quezon City, tomorrow the world! hey teci as long as you remember that it's all about God and not you ok? ;p )
- i will have the opportunity to share and discuss God's Word in books, in newspapers, on TV, on radio, and face to face with my brothers and sisters (that's everyone else)
- actually, i will still have the opportunity to show everyone that YES, IT CAN BE DONE! you can love and follow God even while having a doctorate in physics and having taught science in the most secular school in the country
of course, many things can still happen from today until the end of my yearly-renewed contract on May 31, 2007. and it's still possible that this particular decision is not God's will for me.
which is why,
please please pray for me :)
especially because, if this decision
is God's will, then i will suddenly lose financial security and move out --- nay, plunge headlong --- out of my comfort zone.
how exciting! ;p
why is writing my true calling?
**
more than ten years ago... **
unknown relative: would you like to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior?
teci, age 15: (i nodded, and thought to myself, why not? it would sound bad if i said no...)
**
months later **
teci, still age 15: i'm going to be a doctor in physics to look for aliens! yeah!
**
October 2005 **
teci, age 23: why? why can't i get anything published? (for those who don't know: if your work gets published in a scientific journal, that means you have contributed new knowledge to the world of science. it's a big deal, though in some instances like this i was having a hard time over a supposedly easy publication.)
God, in that still small voice:
write for Me.
i'll never forget that moment. the world suddenly changed and everything suddenly made sense. well, a lot of things still weren't perfect including my immediate future, but that Word --- three one-syllable words! and it's not i-love-you! though i know He loves me too! --- changed everything. suddenly it's as if the barely recognizable landscape had some plastic wrapper ripped off it and i saw everything more clearly.
it's funny how we think we know what we want.
it's funny how what God wants, is actually what we want too.
it's funny how when God says what He wants, i realized that's what i wanted too. then and only then.
funny. and i'm not ashamed of being called "slow" or "stupid" especially when it comes to my personal destiny. besides, as
Rick Warren's "Purpose-Driven Life" posits, it's the
Creator who knows best about the
created...fortunately, we can all read the
Manual.
so now i'm taking a more specific, more immediate, short-term-decision-with-long-term-consequences. there's actually nothing to be afraid of! think about it:
if God has always blessed me to overflowing, what more now when i am purposefully following His plan for me?
what more indeed.
:)
haha, it seems i don't need your prayers after all! ;p (KIDDING!!!!)
(praise You, God of all, for even as i write this You're speaking comfort and reassurance to me...and i am
excited. yeah!)
**
January 7, 2007 **
teci, age 24: i'm going to be a doctor in physics while writing for God! yeah!
(these verses have time and again been the summary of my life so far)
1 Give thanks to the LORD, for He is good;
His love endures forever.
2 Let Israel say:
"His love endures forever."
3 Let the house of Aaron say:
"
His love endures forever."
4 Let those who fear the LORD say:
"His love endures forever."
5 In my anguish I cried to the LORD,
and He answered by setting me free.
6 The LORD is with me; I will not be afraid.
What can man do to me?
7 The LORD is with me; He is my helper.
I will look in triumph on my enemies.
8 It is better to take refuge in the LORD
than to trust in man.
9 It is better to take refuge in the LORD
than to trust in princes.
10 All the nations surrounded me,
but in the name of the LORD I cut them off.
11 They surrounded me on every side,
but in the name of the LORD I cut them off.
12 They swarmed around me like bees,
but they died out as quickly as burning thorns;
in the name of the LORD I cut them off.
13 I was pushed back and about to fall,
but the LORD helped me.
14 The LORD is my strength and my song;
He has become my salvation.
15 Shouts of joy and victory
resound in the tents of the righteous:
"The LORD's right hand has done mighty things!
16 The LORD's right hand is lifted high;
the LORD's right hand has done mighty things!"
17 I will not die but live,
and will proclaim what the LORD has done.
18 The LORD has chastened me severely,
but He has not given me over to death.
19 Open for me the gates of righteousness;
I will enter and give thanks to the LORD.
20 This is the gate of the LORD
through which the righteous may enter.
21 I will give you thanks, for You answered me;
You have become my salvation.
22 The stone the builders rejected
has become the capstone;
23 the LORD has done this,
and it is marvelous in our eyes.
24 This is the day the LORD has made;
let us rejoice and be glad in it.
25 O LORD, save us;
O LORD, grant us success.
26 Blessed is he who comes in the name of the LORD.
From the house of the LORD we bless you.
27 The LORD is God,
and He has made His light shine upon us.
With boughs in hand, join in the festal procession
up
to the horns of the altar.
28 You are my God, and I will give You thanks;
You are my God, and I will exalt You.
29 Give thanks to the LORD, for He is good;
His love endures forever.