here's something from the NBA...

Fall seven times. Get up eight. --- Dwyane Wade

For the righteous falls seven times and rises again. --- Proverbs 24:16a

(i wasn't the only one who noticed that Wade gave all glory to God and no one else when he was awarded 2006 MVP, right after Miami won finals. Yeah. all glory indeed :) )

blessed on june 21, 2006

here are my praise reports for today:

• the sweet smile from my adviser, the kind of smile i hadn't seen before, and successfully motivating me to go go go =)
• i'm allowed to enrol (and admitted into the PhD Physics program!) beyond the deadline. Yay!
• a very chunky thesis. who would've thought? =)
• promotion everywhere:
• physics women cell group leader (bigger cell...yeah!)
• physics 71 course group leader (huwat? although of course this is just on a rotation basis...but i need the motivation to organize!)
• research adviser of a cool labmate (cool!)
• i'm now a PhD student of physics (whoa!!)
• still lecturer (yay!)
• computer cluster in charge (whoa! mind you, i know nothing about this, but i'm glad for the added challenge)
• promising research topics and publications-in-waiting (come on!)
• student of ENLI (Every Nation Leadership Institute) year 2 (all right!)

• long-"lost" friends: now they're making contact! i can talk about how Christ saved me! :D

dead...in a good way (!)

i just saw probably the last episode of X-Men: Evolution. i think it was the last because Prof. Charles Xavier was already talking about his glimpses of how the X-Men will be in the future. and --- surprise surprise --- Jean will be the Phoenix and will be their enemy.

and to think just eleven hours before that i watched X-Men 3: The Last Stand. (again. for only the third time in as many weeks! :p ) it's really frustrating to see my favorite character in all of fictiondom die again and again. but almost as frustrating is seeing her take the wrong way. arg!

so. she's dead in the comics, and even in the alternate reality in the comics...she's dead in two out of the three movies. now i see the cartoon. oh man. is it destiny? fate? an endless hopeless cycle?

what about me? is it a warning to be cautious? or a note to not-even-bother-'coz-you-will-choose-the-wrong-side-in-the-end-anyway?

Judas. i've always wondered how and who he was before he blabbed about Jesus's whereabouts. has he always been evil? or, just misunderstood, 'till the very end? (side note: i've only heard secondhand info about the Gospel of Judas. but aside from authenticity issues, here's the thing: just because something good came out of something bad doesn't make the bad thing less bad. but thank God He works through our mistakes, and forgives our sins.)

what about me? are things really as hopeless as they look?

thank God for that other movie, Luther. =)
"So if the Devil throws your sins at your face, tell him this: 'Yes i've sinned, but what of it? I have someone who acted on my behalf: His name is Jesus Christ, Son of the Living God."

(the lines in the movie were more eloquent than that, will have to check when i get back my cd :) )

and of course, i often repeat this to myself:

"We have died to sin, how can we live in it any longer?" (Romans 6:2)

i also noticed that Jean is dead for the entire time that i'm following Christ. =) well, i do need all the help i can get --- a little bad influence is already little too much for me.

thanks to the X-Men comics, i've learned how to hope, to dream, to stand, to fight. but now that my idol is (still) dead, i can be free to live my own life: God-centered (now that's not in the comics) instead of self-centered.

besides, in my heart of hearts, i know they'll bring her back. =) and then, happily, i can compare notes. =)

X3 from Christian viewpoints :)

i'm glad i came across this site: HollywoodJesus.com :) but of course, what else will i be browsing about but...X-Men 3! :D let's hear what they have to say...


xxx But a war could be coming, and movies like The Da Vinci Code and X-Men suggest that lines are already being drawn.
(from the article "Wow! It delivers!")


xxx Like the X-Men, Christians have been transformed (or perhaps you could say mutated by Jesus Christ), and though they stand apart from the world, they still fight to save the world that would persecute and hate them.

You might even call Christians the Ex-Men, for Jesus has made them into something new. Jesus brings freedom, redemption and eternal life, making all who accept Him into a new creation, a new person free from the past and free from sin. Soon, however, the choice to accept that mutation might be gone. Regardless of your beliefs, know this: if the battle comes, and a last stand has to be made, it may already be too late to choose sides. It's worth thinking about now. What would you rather be? Man or Ex-Man?
(from the article "Wow! It delivers!")

xxx “Don’t let it control you.” – Professor Xavier

This fanboy take on the classic Dark Phoenix storyline represents that internal battle we face as we wrestle with that part of ourselves we believe to be unchecked, our sense of freedom, individuality, and self-sufficiency taken to extreme. Like Jean Grey, it is our other self, the product of fallen creation, living contrary to what we were created to be. The path of The Phoenix, with its subtle Jean Grey possessed by Phoenix imagery, leaves only entropy and death in its wake.

“Be what you are, what nature intended.” – Magneto

We’re all born with this inner beast, this out of control aspect to ourselves. The struggle is one that Wolverine especially identifies with. We all have a choice to make, to choose to be what you are. The choice of how to live, of what to be about, is represented in deciding between the way of Professor Xavier (the path of control/help, ultimately leading to peace and reconciliation) and that of and Magneto (unbridled freedom ultimately leading to chaos and death).
(from the article "I didn't exactly go into this movie with high hopes")

xxx Professor Xavier preaches a gospel message of peace and reconciliation. He believes that the best way to spread this message is by providing a safe place for people to work out their questions all the while teaching them ways to discipline themselves so that they can control themselves. Such safe havens involve first being a community, allowing people to have a sense of belonging before believing. People need to find a place to call home, a place to belong, and people to call family. As Storm put it, “we work as a team.”
(from the article "I didn't exactly go into this movie with high hopes")


xxx Phoenix: You would die for them.
Wolverine: Not for them. For you.

Freedom to live as you were meant to live comes at a cost. “If you want freedom, you have to fight for it,” Magneto says. To be formed into the people we were meant to be requires discipline. A choice, community, formation, the path of discipleship is a long and difficult one. As Robert Webber put it “discipleship is a long obedience in the same direction,” but it is a journey worth taking in order to fulfill the vision of a world united.
(from the article "I didn't exactly go into this movie with high hopes")


xxx I didn’t feel as though any true savior shone through in this film. It was very much the muddled, miry world of hypocrisy and confusion that we wrestle with every day. As a wise man once said in the book of Judges, “everyone did what was right in their own eyes.” If you read the book of Judges, you’ll see that most often that leads to pain, suffering, violence, and death. Some people had good intentions, others bad, but things rarely ended well. The same can be said for this film, and pretty much the course of our daily lives.
(from the article “The greatest sacrifice will be made”)

xxx There is a hopelessness that pervades X-Men: The Last Stand and the only thing that brings any peace is a final, desperate act of true love and sacrifice.
(from the article “The greatest sacrifice will be made”)


xxx Jean’s struggle is also particularly resonant in the film as she struggles with dual identities. I think we often feel this way, as our conscience pricks us and yet we act wickedly. Long ago the apostle Paul wrote in his letter to the Romans that “I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing.” This Jekyll and Hyde concept, this war within, is not unique to Jean’s character or Paul. We know this war burns inside us, and — honestly — that we are not capable of containing it ourselves; we need help, and not the kind that just reads minds, fires eyebeams or sprouts knuckle-claws. We need help from above.

X-Men: The Last Stand will solve your desire for a great weekend flick. To cure the raging “phoenix” inside you? That requires something more.
(from the article “The greatest sacrifice will be made”)


xxx Ralph Winter one of the producers for the X-Men series along with other films like The Fantastic Four, The X-Men, Planet of the Apes, the upcoming highly anticipated Ted Dekker story, Three and numerous others has as a part of his intent, the telling of spiritual themes, specifically related to Christianity in his movies. While The Last Stand is not as powerful in this way as X-Men II, it still has as a part of it’s underlying themes, the concept of forgiveness, redemption, sacrifice and ultimate love. Recently on CBN with Scott Ross Winter spoke in detail about his faith.

Winter who once thought he would become a pastor was once actually a youth ministry found his niche in his first successful film, Star Trek II The Wrath of Kahn. That success has continued on with a few missteps along the way but overall, making great strides from one film to the next. Winter, and his work has definitely become a factor worth noticing among many Christians, and non-Christians alike in the world of making film.

Winter has been open about part of the Christian themes he wants to see displayed in the X-Men series. “I’m part of the development process of those stories, and I think you will find some of those values in there in terms of tolerance and how we treat each other and who the hero is and what he values, what he fights for.”

Winter also understands the importance of telling a good story, but even more importantly so, telling a good story from a Christian perspective. When asked about this he replied, “Well, how come we, as Christians, don’t tell stories that we’re so fascinated by? “It’s got to have a happy ending; it can’t be dark. It’s got to be happy. And I’m not sure what the subtext is. It’s got to be obvious.” I don’t think we know our audience. Well, Jesus’ stories resonates with everyone whether you’re a Christian or not. We have to learn about telling original and interesting stories.”

(from the article “This wonderful cast brings the comic to life”)


“I think we have to come up with an example or model or a paradigm of the kinds of movies that we, as Christians, will be proud of that will begin to infect the rest of the culture."
(from the article “This wonderful cast brings the comic to life”)

thank God...we're not God :)

This entire article is from HollywoodJesus.com. :)

The phoenix, Jean Grey, arose
Melinda Ledman

Many things about this film impressed me, but I walked away mostly impacted by Jean Grey. Sitting comfortably in my seat of expectation, I surmised that the primary forces for good and evil would be as clearly defined as previous X-Men films. The “Last Stand” would simply be the final battle of wit and will between Xavier and Magneto. From that comfort zone, the phoenix, Jean Grey (Famke Janssen), arose from the flames of predictability and hung her allegiance in the balances.

Jean Grey really becomes the ultimate villain. She is a force that we the viewers have little capacity to imagine. Rather than being the ultimate evil creature, she is an all-powerful goddess with no defined conscience. She is terrifying, angry, and limitless. Her uncontrollable passion or rage can be ignited by the slightest word or deed of her inferiors. Jean Grey is fickle and conflicted - equally capable of benevolence and evil. Instead of giving us the worst villain imaginable, X-Men 3 gives us a villain we cannot imagine.

Worse than being eternally evil, Jean is eternally unpredictable. When Xavier explains the process he once used to help Jean control her power, Jean ceases to be a known entity. Although part of her can be understood from the past (Jean), the largely unknown side of her mind (Phoenix) is capable of anything. In one scene with Wolverine, she reveals her erratic nature. Wracked by grief over her destruction of a life, she claims, “Kill me now before I kill anyone else.” But as quickly as Wolverine suggests that Xavier can help her fix the problem, she screams, “I don’t want to FIX it!” Knowledgeable of the power she has to destroy, she is also jealous to keep that power.

Worse than being extremely powerful, her power is uncontrolled. When Xavier meets Jean for the first time as a child, he challenges her, “You have more power than you can imagine. The question is, will you control that power or let it control you?” Skip ahead 20 years to the classroom at the school. Xavier teaches his students about the use and misuse of their powers. He drills them on ethical behavior. Then later at the most crucial moment of his life, he challenges Jean again, “Don’t let it control you.” In actuality, we spend the majority of our time hoping and wishing that Jean will gain control of her power. We know that even her good energy has a destructive effect.

Worse than being resolute in her ways, she is influenced by others’ intentions. Despite her profound ability to read and understand men’s motives (exposing Xavier’s desire to control her for good as equal to Magneto’s desire to control her for evil), she still chooses to operate under the influence of others’ motives. When Magneto offers to endow her with great power, she follows her lust for destruction. Yet, when Wolverine pleads with her conscience, she responds with reason and good will.

Jean Grey is the antithesis of all we believe to be good and true about God. It’s difficult to imagine an all-powerful, angry God, although Jonathan Edwards’ sermon, “Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God,” gives us a nice taste. And it’s even more frightening to behold on screen. The swirling debris, black eyes, and strained blood vessels (special effects get MAJOR kudos) that came with Jean’s wrath called me to a gratefulness for the God that I know. What if God was unpredictable and we could never know his character or intention for our lives? What if his power was greater than his ability to control it? Worse, what if he based his decisions for this earth on the whim of the latest influence? I shudder to think of what the world would be like if he took my advice half the time. I’m glad God has a mind of his own, and it gives me great comfort to read passages like the ones below that reveal God’s character.

“Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today and forever.” Hebrews 13:8
“For the word of the LORD is right and true; he is faithful in all he does. The Lord loves righteousness and justice; the earth is full of his unfailing love.” Psalm 33:4-5

Now, I’m not trying to tone down God’s wrath and power. By all means, he promises to destroy his adversaries one day. Nevertheless, it is not his ultimate will that we die apart from him. 2 Peter 3:9 says, “The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise [to come again], as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.”

In this muted, toned-down world of mediocrity, X-Men 3 reminds me that God has the power to destroy, and to save. And it inspires me that he chooses to save, despite our ignorance of him (we are like the lady who locks her car door after Magneto moves the bridge). It’s good to know we can rely on his unfailing love, his controlled providence, and his resolute will to prevail against all the evil this world offers up to him.

things i gotta be reminded of everyday :)

"I tell you the truth,
whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me...
whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me."
--- Matthew 25: 40, 45


"We died to sin; how can we live in it any longer?"
--- Romans 6:2

not just a pop song, 13: far away

"Far Away"
by Chantal Kreviazuk

(video)

Make me believe in You
Honestly for real one thing true
Take me in Your arms
Wandering alone seems so far

Let me know that You made it as far as forever
Let me know that You hear when I cry if You can
You're far away from me
You're far away from me
You're far away from me
Come a little closer just a little

Let me know heaven sees
Shines on life our memories
Make me feel all that You are
Angel child or a radiant star

'Coz I know that we'll meet up again in forever
Let me know that You'll be waiting for me in the end

You're far away from me
You're far away from me
You're far away from me
Come a little closer just a little

You're far away from me
You're far away from me
You're far away from me
Come a little closer just a little

Just a little
Just a little
Just a little
Just a little

not just a pop song, 12: when it was over

"When It Was Over"
by Sara Groves

When it was over and they could talk about it
She said there's just one thing I have got to know
What in that moment when you were running so hard and fast
Made you stop and turn for home
He said I always knew you loved me even though I'd broken your heart
I always knew there'd be a place for me to make a brand new start

Oh love wash over a multitude of things
Love wash over a multitude of things
Love wash over a multitude of things
Make us whole

When it was over and they could talk about it
They were sitting on the couch
She said what on earth made you stay here
When you finally figured out what I was all about

He said I always knew you'd do the right thing
Even though it might take some time
She said, Yeah, I felt that and that's probably what saved my life

Oh love wash over a multitude of things
Love wash over a multitude of things
Love wash over a multitude of things
Make us whole

There is a love that never fails
There is a healing that always prevails
There is a hope that whispers a vow
A promise to stay while we're working it out
So come with your love and wash over us

Oh love wash over a multitude of things
Love wash over a multitude of things
Jesus save us from a multitude of things
Make us whole

There is a love that never fails
There is a healing that always prevails
There is a hope that whispers a vow
A promise to stay while we're working it out

A promise to wait
A promise to stay
So come with Your love and wash over us

not just a pop song, 11: borrowed heaven

"Borrowed Heaven"
by The Corrs

(see concert video with Andrea's explanation)

All beauty all fade away, borrowed
All moonlight, return today, borrowed
All sunrise all shooting stars, borrowed
All earth bound bare feet in day
You know we're standing on

Borrowed borrowed heaven
Borrowed borrowed heaven

All heartache all rivers cried, borrowed
Don't stay out too late tonight, borrowed
I love You don't wanna die, borrowed
You taste like paradise, I know I'm breathing in

Borrowed borrowed heaven
Borrowed borrowed heaven
Borrowed borrowed heaven
Borrowed borrowed heaven

You have my life and I will give it back
But before I do, I'm gonna hold it tight
This is my prayer

All body, All skin all bone, borrowed
All silky, all smooth and warm, borrowed
Almighty I stand alone I know I'm living in

Borrowed borrowed heaven ...
All beauty will fade away

not just a pop song, 10: everyday miracles

"Everyday Miracles"
by Sara Groves

It's the everyday miracles
That keep my hope alive
It's the way You move in little things
That help me survive

And I know You move in greater ways
But this is great enough for me
What You do with my everyday is amazing

The things that seem impossible
I lay down at Your feet
And just when I am needing most
You are there for me

And I know you've made the lame to walk
And caused the blind to see
But what You do with my everyday is amazing

When I'm down on my knees
And I can't make it through
When it's up to me
It's really up to You

not just a pop song, 9: next thing you know

"Next Thing You Know (Thirteen)"
by Matthew West

I remember when I was thirteen
I saw a picture on my T.V. screen
The Reverend Billy Graham and the people singing "Just As I Am"
And it felt like You were talking to me

And the whole world seemed to fade away
Until I heard my mother say
"Son, are you okay? Do you wanna pray?"
And that became the hour I first believed

Next thing you know
I'm high and flyin'
Next thing you know
My heart is in Your hands
Next thing you know
There's no denyin'
Next thing you know
I'm a brand new man

Well, I wish I could say
I always stayed right there
And I did until my freshman year
But the world was pulling me a long way from thirteen
And You were calling but I didn't hear

Still I knew there was something more
So, one day my knees hit the dorm room floor
I said, "If you're there, and if you really care,
Come and talk to me like I was thirteen."

Next thing you know
I'm high and flyin'
Next thing you know
My heart is in Your hands
Next thing you know
There's no denyin'
Next thing you know
I'm a brand new man

Got a picture in my head today
Of how heaven might look someday
I see the people there, so I pull up a chair
And their stories, they blow me away

'Cause I can see it on every face
The evidence of grace
And as I listen it occurs to me
Everybody's got their own thirteen

So, what's your story about His glory?
You gotta find your place in the history of grace
Yeah, what's your story about His glory?
Come on and find your place

Next thing you know
I'm high and flyin'
Next thing you know
My heart is in Your hands
Next thing you know
There's no denyin'
Next thing you know
I'm a brand new man

not just a pop song, 8: breathing

"Breathing"
by Lifehouse

I'm finding my way back to sanity, again
Though I don't really know what I am gonna do when I get there
Take a breath and hold on tight
Spin around one more time
And gracefully fall back in the arms of grace

I am hanging on every word You say
And even if You don't want to speak tonight
That's alright, alright with me
'Cause I want nothing more than to sit
Outside Heaven's door and listen to You breathing
Is where I want to be

I am looking past the shadows
Of my mind into the truth
And I'm trying to identify
The voices in my head
God, which one's You?

Let me feel one more time
What it feels like to feel
And break these calluses off me
One more time

'Cause I am hanging on every word You say
And even if You don't want to speak tonight
That's alright, alright with me
'Cause I want nothing more than to sit
Outside Your door and listen to You breathing
Is where I want to be

I don't want a thing from You
Bet You're tired of me waiting
For the scraps to fall
Off Your table to the ground
I just want to be here now

'Cause I am hanging on every word You say
And even if You don't want to speak tonight
That's alright, alright with me
'Cause I want nothing more than to sit
Outside Your door and listen to You breathing
Is where I want to be

not just a pop song, 7: home

"Home"
by Brian Mcknight

Thinking back when we first met
I remember what You said
You said You'd never leave me

I let go of Your hand
Built my castle in the sand
But now I'm reachin' out again
And I'm not letting go
Till You

Hold me
Mold me
Sometimes I feel so all alone
See, I gotta find me way back home
So why don't You

Shape me
Make me
Wash me whiter than the snow
I gotta find my way
Back home

Master upon my knees I pray
I just want to be the clay
Put Your arms around me

Place my life in Your hands
Lord, I know I'm just a man
I know You understand
This time I'm not letting go
Till You

Anoint me
Appoint me
Sometimes I feel so alone
See, I gotta find my way back home
So why don't You

Chastise me
Baptize me
Wash me whiter than the snow
I gotta find my way

'Cause I'm lost and alone
I've been wandering
Long enough to know
Humbly I search for You
And I'm not gonna rest
Till You

Choose me
Use me
Sometimes I feel so alone
I'm on my way back home
So why don't You

Direct me
Bless me
Wash me whiter then the snow
I'm on my way
Back home

not just a pop song, 6: all i need

All I Need
by Barbie's Cradle

Inside of my heart is an army of angels
Just 'coz I let you go
Oh volunteers they are here to love and help me
only 'coz I've said no
to the killer eyes

that invite me to do things
I would have to lie about
and it's better now

we are safe
you know i love you more from far away
now that all i need is God.

hey little girl
do you still have things that haunt you
are all the words I said unclear
You know I was there
just a while ago so miserable
until I told the truth and prayed
and the killer eyes that invite me
to do things I would have to lie about
just lost their sparkle
and it's better now we are safe
you know I love you more from far away
now that all I need is God.

inside of my heart
is an army of angels waiting for war...

the killer eyes that invite me to do things
I would have to lie about
lost their sparkle
and it's better now
we are safe

you know I love you more from far away
now that all I need is...

Inside of my heart is an army of angels
Inside of my heart is an army of angels
Inside of my heart is an army of angels
Inside of my heart is an army of angels...

I need You so much I am dust without You
I'd lose all the universe just to have You
I need You so much I am dust without You
I'd lose all the universe just to have You...

not just a pop song, 5: the biggest part of me

The biggest part of me

by Take 6

(Take 6 slightly modified the original lyrics to refer to Guess-Who :) )

(Sunrise) There's a new sun arisin'
(In your eyes) I can see a new horizon
(Realize) That will keep me realizin'
You're the biggest part of me

(Through the night) No more feeling here beside me
(Shine the light) Need you close enough to guide me
(For all my life) I've been hopin' He would find me
You're the biggest part of me

Well
Make a wish (make a wish)
When you love Him, you make it come true
Make a list (make a list)
Of the things He'll do for you
Ain't no risk now,
In lettin' His love rain down on you,
If I wash away the past,
So that we may start anew

(Rainbow) Risin' over my shoulder;
(Love flows) Gettin' stronger as we're older
(All I know) All I wanna do is serve Him
He's the life that breathes in me
(Forever) If you work you say forever
(Together) People only be together
(For better) And for me, there's nothin' better
You're the biggest part of me

Well
Make a wish (make a wish)
When you love Him, you make it come true
Make a list (make a list)
Of the things He'll do for you
Ain't no risk now,
In lettin' His love rain down on you,
If I wash away the past,
So that we may start anew

Oh

More than an easy feelin'
(He’s my rejoicing)
How can I tell you
What He means to me?

Make a wish (make a wish)
When you love, you make it come true
Make a list (make a list)
Of the things He'll do for you
Ain't no risk, now,
In lettin' His love rain down on you,
If I wash away the past,
So that we may start anew

(Rainbow) Risin' over my shoulder;
(Love flows) Gettin' stronger as we're older
(All I know) All I wanna do is serve Him
He's the life that breathes in me
(Forever) If you work you say forever
(Together) People only be together
(For better) And for me, there's nothin' better
You're the biggest part of me
You’re the life that breathes in me
(Here’s the biggest part) the biggest part of me

not just a pop song, 4: how sweet it is

(i heard the gospel version of this song, in acapella no less! :D )

"How Sweet It Is"
by James Taylor

How sweet it is to be loved by You
How sweet it is to be loved by You

I needed the shelter of someone's arms, and there You were
I needed someone to understand my ups and downs, and there You were
With sweet love and devotion
Deeply touching my emotion
I want to stop and thank You Jesus
I want to stop and thank You Jesus

How sweet it is to be loved by You
How sweet it is to be loved by You

I close my eyes at night
Wondering where would I be without You in my life
Everything I did was just a bore
Everywhere I went it seems I'd been there before

But You brighten up for me all of my days
With a love so sweet in so many ways
I want to stop and thank You Jesus
I just want to stop and thank You Jesus

How sweet it is to be loved by You
How sweet it is to be loved by You

You were better to me than I was to myself
For me, there's You and there ain't nobody else
I want to stop and thank You Jesus
I just want to stop and thank You Jesus

How sweet it is to be loved by You
How sweet it is to be loved by You

not just a pop song, 3: healing

"Healing"
by Deniece Williams

Now that we have gotten through
One more fall
I can just admit I've got it all
'Cause I do
'Cause I've got You
We've crossed these battle lines too many times
It passes through the heart
But it never leaves a mark

'Cause Your love just keeps on healing me
No matter how I bruise
If I just trust You
Your love just keeps on healing me
One more cure
One more chance that wasn't there before
In Your arms
No pain can harm the way I'm feeling
Lord I know that Your love is healing

I've kicked around those lines in my head
But I never listened to the words that You said
See where it's led
Well I know I have it now
'Cause You showed me how
And all I had to do
Was just to keep my eyes on You

'Cause Your love just keeps on healing me
No matter how I bruise
If I just trust You
Your love just keeps on healing me
One more cure
One more chance that wasn't there before
In Your arms
No pain can harm the way I'm feeling
Lord I know that Your love is healing

'Cause Your love just keeps on healing me
No matter how I bruise
If I just trust You
Your love just keeps on healing me
One more clue
One more chance that wasn't there before
In Your arms
No pain can harm the way I'm feeling

Lord I know that Your love is healing

not just a pop song, 2: ooh child

"Ooh Child"
by Five Stairsteps

Ooh-oo child
Things are gonna get easier
Ooh-oo child
Things'll get brighter
Ooh-oo child
Things are gonna get easier
Ooh-oo child
Things'll get brighter

Some day, yeah
We'll get it together and we'll get it all done
Some day
When your head is much lighter
Some day, yeah
We'll walk in the rays of a beautiful sun
Some day
When the world is much brighter

Ooh-oo child
Things are gonna be easier
Ooh-oo child
Things'll get be brighter
Ooh-oo child
Things are gonna be easier
Ooh-oo child
Things'll get be brighter

Some day, yeah
We'll get it together and we'll get it all done
Some day
When your head is much lighter
Some day, yeah
We'll walk in the rays of a beautiful sun
Some day
When the world is much brighter

Some day, yeah
We'll get it together and we'll get it all done
Some day
When your head is much lighter
Some day, yeah
We'll walk in the rays of a beautiful sun
Some day
When the world is much brighter

Ooh-oo child
Things are gonna get easier
Ooh-oo child
Things'll get brighter
Ooh-oo child
Things are gonna get easier
Ooh-oo child
Things'll get brighter
Right now, right now

not just a pop song, 1: ain't no mountain high enough

(This song was featured in Sister Act 2. Not hard to imagine why :) )

"Ain't No Mountain High Enough"
by Diana Ross

Ohhh
Ain't no mountain high
Ain't no valley low
Ain't no river wide enough, baby

If you need Me, call Me
No matter where you are
No matter how far
Just call out My name
I'll be there in a hurry
You don't have to worry

'Cause baby,
There ain't no mountain high enough
Ain't no valley low enough
Ain't no river wide enough
To keep Me from getting to you

Remember the day
I set you free
I told you
You could always count on Me darlin'
And from that day on I made a vow
I'll be there when you want Me
Some way, somehow

'Cause baby,
There ain't no mountain high enough
Ain't no valley low enough
Ain't no river wide enough
To keep Me from getting to you

No wind (no wind) , no rain (no rain)
{Ohhhh..ooh ooh ooh}
You just call

My love is alive
Deep down in My heart
Although we are miles apart
If you ever need a helping hand
I'll be there on the double
Just as fast as I can

Don't you know that
Ain't no mountain high enough
Ain't no valley low enough
Ain't no river wide enough
To keep Me from you

Ain't no mountain high enough
Ain't no valley low enough
Ain't no river wide enough
To keep Me from you

Don't you know that
There ain't no mountain high enough
Ain't no valley low enough
Ain't no river wide enough

To keep Me from gettin' to you babe...

the last stronghold

it's going down.

grabe, how deceitful the enemy's lies can get. what exactly, may i ask, is wrong with speaking the truth? with admitting i am wrong and someone else is right? with admitting i am weak and someone else is strong? with admitting i need help and someone else can help me?

is there freedom in submission? perhaps that's another topic for another day...but there truly is freedom in facing the truth =) freedom from the seemingly endless cycle of ups and downs, of births and deaths --- freedom leading not to nothingness but to fullness of life.

here's a secret =) i really hate --- hated --- seeing "macho" male characters saving damsels in distress. by extension, i hate --- hated --- asking guys for help. (sure, you might say Jesus was a guy. but it took me twenty-odd years to submit to GOD, for crying out loud! how much longer for those y-chromosomed beings He created?)

externally, i was worried that guys might develop this superhero complex, this "Savior" mentality. i was worried that they might "worship" themseleves in the process. well, it might or might not happen to them. but, i now realize that all along i definitely was "worshipping" myself, that it was i who gave myself more than my due.

again, all these lordship/submission issues might sound odd coming from a Christian who asks God for everything from dorm room lights to jeepney rides. but that was a struggle on a different level. on a way different level than dealing with my, er, fellow humans.

i'm reminded of this story/observation about Adolf Hitler. here he was, proclaiming the superiority of the blond-and-blue-eyed Aryan race when he himself looked like the Jews he was exterminating. (at the very least, Hitler was far from being blond and blue-eyed!) naturally i hated his hypocrisy. but now that i realized my hypocrisy as well, i am doubly the hypocrite for looking down on him.

so to all the guys of this world: sorry for being such a hater. so help me God, i shall remember that i, as a feminist, was a sexist too. so help me God, i will respect the authority of my superiors, female or male. but guys, i will not follow you blokes blindly: however with my contributions i also offer my cooperation.

i really love God's timing in the (seemingly) small moments...to be specific, He uses me to "teach" others something i have to learn myself. because just this morning, as i was overcomplicating this quite "simple" issue, my friend asked me about --- of all verses! --- this one:

"the last shall be the first,

the first shall be the last."

(see Mark 9:35)

ha! =) i immediately felt God talking directly to me =)

as i was texting my friend, sigh, i was telling myself the same things: servant leadership. if Jesus Himself suffered, and accepted His fate, how much more must those who follow Him do as He did? and, i have to admit, i remembered that an opportunity to be humble now leads to an opportunity to be exalted later. (ok, so this last statement can be viewed as (a) selfish and grandstanding, a "fake good deed", or, ideally, as (b) a reassurance that doing what's best and right really is worth it. =) )

when i had Jesus Christ in my life, i can't understand why others won't do the same. why, oh why, can't they admit they can't do everything right, why can't they admit they're not always strong, why can't they admit they need help and just ask for it? how easy it was to forget my own long detours away from God! but, whether or not i was forgetful, i have to understand that they just probably don't know what they're missing. or, perhaps, they have forgotten the goodness of dwelling in God's presence in the midst of all the poor substitutes out there.

admit, admit, admit...i admit i have forgotten, and remember only now, how hard it is to admit my wrongs, weaknesses and needs. should it really make a difference if i admit it to God or to my fellowmen? to a guy?!?!!?! of course not; humility is humility.

and pride, my last stronghold, is going down. let it be so.

=)